There comes a time in every Christian life
where we can look back over our trials and see them with clear eyes. For some, this process takes weeks. For
others, it’s years and years of emotional or even physical recovery. There are
memories… hurts to be healed, people to be forgiven, and bitterness to be
fought. The truth is, true healing and growth can only occur with the Spirit’s
power in you & God’s continued faithfulness every step of the way. First, you must accept the grace &
forgiveness found only in Jesus Christ and second, you have to let Him change
you. Then one day, as if standing on a mountaintop overlooking your past, you
see a grander plan. You see your testimony & purpose.
Two years ago at the age of
26, I found myself in the middle of an unwanted and unwarranted divorce. After five years of marriage to the man I thought I would love
forever, my world came crumbling down. Brick by brick, my fears of not reliving
what I had experienced as a child suddenly became my reality. I was hurt, embarrassed
and felt completely alone. It seemed like God wasn’t hearing my prayers and the
faith I had held onto since I was a young girl was being threatened every
second of every day.
I had two choices, let it kill me or let it
grow me. Little did I know about the journey God was about to take me on.
Every morning I would crawl out of bed and hit
my knees. My prayer was simply, “God, your will be done.” I didn’t know what
else to pray. I had prayed for restoration, answers and understanding. Nothing.
The response I continually received back in the most loving assurance was “I am
with you.”
I had been volunteering at a homeless women
& children’s shelter for about a year teaching bible studies &
chaperoning field trips. For the first time, I could look into those women’s
eyes and relate to their hurt. But, God showed me something more in my time
with them. He showed me His heart for a world in desperate need of Jesus, a
world full of far greater problems than my temporary trials. This realization
didn’t take my pain away, numbed it at best, but it gave me a renewed
perspective on life.
Jesus said the greatest commandment was to
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all
your mind.” The second greatest commandment wasn’t to live a good life and be
happy. No, it was, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:37-39) I think
because in loving our neighbors, we find true happiness & satisfaction. It
fills our greatest hurts & needs because it takes our minds off them and
directs them to the mind of Christ.
I learned so much from the women & children
at this shelter. They will never know how much they taught me. As I continued
volunteering every week over the next year I felt God preparing me for more. My
heart for inner-city ministry was huge. I wanted to make a bigger impact so I
began to pray for it. Whatever “it” might be.
Then, one day a friend of mine approached me
about an inner-city door-to-door small group they were starting. They knew I
had experience with & a heart for those things. Without hesitation I said,
“Yes!” Long story short, this small group is now going on a second year of
ministry in the Woodlawn area of Birmingham, Alabama. What started out as
around 6 people knocking on strangers doors in might I add, a very dangerous
part of town, has grown to a kid’s ministry, landscaping team, construction
team, food team, and continued growth each month as we meet more & more
neighbors. We gather every 3rd Saturday of the month and serve our
hearts out! We have been able to share & be the Gospel for an entire
neighborhood that has been plagued by poverty, drugs, prostitution and
violence. Every 3rd Saturday
is a constant reminder to me of God’s faithfulness in their lives because I
have seen His faithfulness in my own.
Yes, God hates divorce. And after going through
it I can say that I do to. I will never have answers as to why and I’m OK with
that. Philippians 3:13-13 says it best, “Forget what is behind & strain
towards what is ahead. God’s goal, which He has called me towards.”
(Paraphrased)
So here I am, I stand on my mountaintop and
look around at the valleys I have traveled through and see a God whose promise
of, “I am with you” never failed. None of His promises ever fail. God restored
my heart to love again. Almost 2 months ago I married a man with the same
passion for God & people and a vision to see our city change. He jokes that
he had a choice to watch football one Saturday or come volunteer in Woodlawn
with our group. Wanting to “get to know me better” he choose the latter &
fell in love with not only Woodlawn but me as well.
This blog is a way for me to share what we have
learned & continue to learn through inner-city ministry to encourage others
to serve their communities and use their passions & gifts to bring the
hope of Jesus to this world. It’s a way
to let my testimony be used. Revelation 12:11 says“… they conquered him (the
enemy) by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they
loved not their lives even unto death.”
I hope my story & words inspire you,
Sarah
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